Barely.

It starts to crash on me one by one. Suddenly those nights that would seem rather extraordinary before seem so dull now. Eventful, but dull. 

I sometimes wish I didn't throw more oil into our already burning bridge, I sometimes wish I had kept every reminder of you, or at least the ones I where I had a choice. Reminders still exist, of course. I would be naive to deny that. 

It's just that I don't want to remember, but I can't seem to forget either.

Having barely enough of you to hang on, eh?

Where did your heart go missing?

Am I slowly beginning to hate the one person who showed me that the world could be a beautiful place? Am I like this because he decorated my world and tore it all down in a span of months? He could've been my something turned everything, so much so that it mildly hurts to type this now. Over-complications were unnecessary, and yet I succumbed.

I still care about you and love you, of course. I just don't know in what context do I do.. Why can't we be in something where context doesn't matter? I love someone. I care about that person. That's all there is to it.

 
Had he opened.

An attitude of gratitude.

 Now listening : James Morrison - One Last Chance

It's amazing how I always find myself spending weekends anywhere else but This Place. Went back last weekend and this time, I spent it at Jill's place, all the way in Subang. It took a surprisingly short time to get there probably because I was so engrossed in observing friendly, creepy, deaf, foreign strangers on the LRT. Gorgeous dude with braces was my favourite subject :P

We chose Carl's Jr [WAITER DUDE YOUR ACCENT WTF] to eat at after 4023904 attempts at deliberation, mostly because bacon inside burgers might just be the epitome of all that is awesome. Sat there on our hungry, skinny asses [U MAD?] eating and talking about life and  its poignancy. I'm not joking, we never talked about anything remotely happy and carried this trend back to her appato. We just concluded that we're two terribly bitter people who hate the world. To disagree would be synonymous with lying. 
 
I went to City Harvest Church with her the next morning. It was amazing, really. I can't help but to find a way to get myself to service there every week. It was just..beautiful. God spoke to us (:

i

Pictures in the loo. So mainstream it hurts.

Before sending me back, we went for karaoke to BE DEPRESSED AND SING PAINFULLY SAD SONGS AND THEN JUST QUIT IN THE MIDDLE BECAUSE IT GOT TOO SAD DAMMIT.

Seeing my best friend made my weekend (:


AND HELL YESSSS I'VE FINALLY FOUND VANILLA TWIGGIES HERE YESH YESH YESH.
Also, I made an ass out of myself in public spazzing when I saw the Twiggies. There was this man, about 40ish who imitated my spazzing. I could see he was so amused.

BUT WHO GIVES A CRAP ABOUT SELF-WORTH WHEN YOU HAVE AN ABUNDANCE OF VANILLA TWIGGIES?

It's hard to learn.

The drop in Sweet Nothing gives me the feeling that I should be wearing a flowing dress and jumping like a loon.

I should be over this by now. Sigh. Why are you like this, self?

Am I ready?

Now Listening : Nicky Romero & ZROQ - WTF!? 

I think I've been dragging my heels on writing a decent enough blogpost on college UNI. It still tastes bitter on my tongue. Uni is pretty much synonymous with the words "Stress" "Die" "Die from stress" in my mind right now. Classes are starting off next Monday with Introduction to Sociology. Since it's a short semester and UTAR knows we incapable of learning much about AM/CS in 7 weeks (tambah mid-term okay siao), they made us take electives for this sem instead. Annnddd yesh, Introduction to Sociology. I reckon it's going to be a brief fling with sociology because if further my commitments, I'm going to be in a relationship with psychology. Lol.

I moved into a room in a condominium way too fancy for me but on the bright side, Jen moved in with me. BLESS MY LIFE NO MORE LONELY DINNERS! So far, so good. It's a place with relatively high foreigner density. I may have just invented that word up but tis' the truth, bro. I'm not particularly alarmed by it, it's just way different from any other place I've lived before. My quest to find an average looking Middle Eastern still continues and I seem to be failing, THEY'RE ALL SO FREAKING GORGEOUS OKAY. 

Regarding UTAR. um. No comments. Snooty staff lady at the information counter. Nyeh nyeh.

Evidently, it's not safe to walk around much here so I'm going to have to sacrifice my beloved foreveralone walks at night. How I miss Penang right now :\

The malls here are pretty cool, they're mid-range KL malls but still levels higher than Ipoh's highest-level malls. We very the kampung lah, what to do.

Not sure if I'll be updating frequently. Time passes too fast, it's hard to catch up when you can't even realize how behind you are on your schedule but I'll try :)

Weddings

Now Listening : Clazziquai Project - Flea / Jojal Remix -Audition Grandprix-

I turned 19 a couple of days ago and I'm writing this because I sincerely feel the need to write about something awesome anyway. Syok Sendiri time is nao. Skyped with Jo, Kristal and Jill straight into my birthday and I think we've never done a collective birthday wish in Skype before, but there's a first time for everything, amirite? I thank God everyday we've been together so so long, long enough to make people jealous enough but hell, we still have forever and more to go. I love these girls.

No, I don't always feel like a minority..

Failbuckets :P I'm not going to post the picture of them getting it right cos Unnie might just kill me.

Elaine got me mooncakes and not just run-of-the-mill ones, she got me PANDAN mooncakes :D

Aren't they cute? Super expensive as well.

 I still went to work on Saturday despite having slept 4 hours the night before and not even an inch close to being finished with my packing. Last day of work and funnily enough, I worked the most hours I had ever worked there.. Ivy, Elaine and Victoria took me out for lunch and Chloe joined after. They're such nice people. I feel so undeserving loved.

A myriad, more or less. It wasn't that nice.

I don't know what it's fully called but mmmhmmmm.

Cake, because cake is nice.

Me, Ivy and Chloe. I'm going to miss my 'partners' at work :(

With Elaine and Victoria ^^

 Went for my cousin's wedding that night, unfettered by the fact that I was still behind when it came to packing. Leaving the next morning? WHO GIVES A SHIT? Anyway, the bride looked so super gorgeous and the food was good, that's all. Lol.

 And when it came to signing the guestbook, this is what my troll of a brother in law did.

Yes, that's supposed to be my nephew. Lol

I moved to KL the morning after. Will blog about it soon. I'm currently suffering from LEG PAINS LEVEL 999 :(

Playlist II

Ed Sheeran - Small Bump

The Head and The Heart - Heaven Go Easy on Me

Example - Last Ones Standing

Coldplay - U.F.O.

Epik High feat. Itta - 거미줄

Sebastian Ingrosso vs. Justice vs. Simian - Kidsos vs. We Are Your Friends  [Acapella]

Andra & The Backbone - Selamat Tinggal Masa Lalu

I'm From Barcelona - Rec & Play

Avicii & Nicky Romero - Fuck School

Yuki [Honey & Clover OST] - Fugainaiya

Interpol - The Lighthouse

Epitone Project - Sketch 1

De-Phazz - Hot Little Harp

Florence + The Machine - Kiss With A Fist

All American Rejects - The Last Song