16 days

A few weeks ago, you were sick with what everyone thought was measles. I had a few tests and a proposal due the next week but I visited you anyway. Because even though you were surrounded by your husband, your kids and your doting babysitter. I went over anyway because you were sad that mum and dad didn't come to visit. I brought you food, forwent my books, stayed over despite the fucking risk of a highly contagious virus. Because I love you, and you're the only sibling I have alive now and honestly, if you didn't at least have me to visit, then what's the point of being family?

But the fact that the roles are switched now and you've just been ignoring my calls and texts is hurtful. Unlike you, I don't have anyone close to me over here. He doesn't stay here nor does he come around anymore. I'm not in the priority list for well, anyone except mum and dad. But to expect them to drop everything to come take care of me is misguided. It's just a fever, after all. As for him, well that's just another matter I'm too exhausted to discuss.

So I'll get over it. I'll get better because in the end, I'm all I have. Of course, that doesn't mean I'll stop loving everyone close to me, to even remotely suggest that is mean and depressing.

I don't go out much, not that I actually can because there's always something to be done. And traveling itself takes up too much time. It's been exactly 16 days since I went out to the mall, and that was only to buy groceries. My days are basically "Wake up - campus - come back - sleep - repeat cycle" now and at the very least, Alyson is always nice enough to talk to me. But she's pretty held up with stuff too, and that's okay. I don't expect her to drop everything to see me, of course. But I know that she would if I only asked.

You, on the other hand, are thoroughly ungrateful and mean.

And you, well I'm not surprised I basically don't exist if I'm even so much as 20 feet away from you.