Lumping together Day 2 and Day 3

DAY 2.

So I wanted to blog yesterday about Day 2 but was too caught up in studying Operations Research till I ended up falling head-flat-eye-grazing-paper style on my notes. I'd like to point out that despite how that shows I'm totes srs about my studies, I was just really, really tired. Also, I had a mini-go-crazy moment two days ago and ended up taking 3 pills which led to a crapload of cluster headaches and nausea.

Depressed?

After snapping out of my ~special phase~, the first thing I wanted to do was say a little prayer and start my meditation. God knows if it had worked but I was desperate enough to try anything. For day 2's meditation, I tried this new technique I devised by counting backwards from 100 in intervals of 10 after which, I would spent about a minute or so counting my blessings for the day.

Being Christian, I thanked God but in all honesty, it's not like meditation has to be specific to religion and I urge anyone trying this out to just thank yourself if you have to. Heck, thank the universe if you want to. The most important part is to recognize the good that happened and the bad, working from there to improve.

I'll say other than focusing on your breathing, the whole Count Your Blessings method seems to help pass the time. Then again, that shouldn't be the case but I'm only a anxious beginner after all :D Again, I can't say that I felt anything remotely new afterwards other than a sense of overwhelming surrealism and some peace.

DAY 3

I went back to Ipoh today right after class and as a result, I couldn't do my meditation (Or my work out session!) in the evening. Still, I felt a little off and restless having been accustomed to doing it for two days (I get hooked fast lol) so just past the Kampar station, I said "Fuck it" and just meditated in the train. The train had come to a temporary halt and I thought it'd be an excellent way to pass time since my laptop was already out of juice.

I couldn't watch Downton Abbey :(
AND UGH SYBIL WHY WHY WHY.

This time though, I honestly felt like a happy little vacuum afterwards. I can't exactly describe the feeling but if I were to try my best, I'd say it was some sort of satisfactory hollowness. Pardon my Francaise. It felt GOOOOOOOOOD.

I'm really happy with the progress, however little :)